Inside the cafe it smells like fresh coffee and baking bread. Jazz music plays indistinctly behind the noise of human conversation. A coffeemaker beeps cheerfully and the lone barista behind the counter jots down orders hurriedly.
A handful of heads look up distractedly as the door opens with a jaunty jingle. A draft of brisk winter air shoves the smell of coffee aside momentarily.
Tall damp boots track melting snow across the floor and she sits down heavily in the empty chair across from him. Her nose and cheeks are red from the cold as she sniffles loudly into a thick scarf. She carries her book bag slung over her left shoulder and lets it slip off onto the floor beside her boots with a loud thud. The metal chair creaks half-heartedly as she shrugs off her jacket and frees her arms.
“I’m sorry I’m so late.” She is somewhat breathless as she pulls off the scarf but keeps a wool hat tight over messy brown hair. She tears off her gloves with her teeth and spits them onto her lap with relish. “Traffic was brutal. Some kind of accident. Thank god it’s nice and warm in here.”
He puts down the book he had been reading for the past half-hour and marks the page with a napkin that had been tucked beneath an already-empty cup. “It’s fine. I wasn’t waiting too long.”
She sets her phone facedown on the table and rolls her eyes dramatically though they are rueful. “You always say that. Even when I’m an hour late.”
His mouth twitches and he narrowly bites back a smile. “Well. I was trying to be polite. Little something called ‘common courtesy.’ It’s all the rage right now.”
“Never heard of it.” She grins wolfishly full of teeth and raises an eyebrow sharply at him. “Such a gentleman.”
“No need to sound so skeptical. I do try. On occasion. When it counts.” He smooths his jacket with his hands and adjusts his sleeves self-consciously.
She pretends to ignore him and looks around instead. Her eyes are flashing though she cannot help the smile tugging traitorously at her lips. “I wasn’t sure I was even going to make it at all. The weather’s been so shit lately. I had to dig my car out of like two feet of snow just to get here.”
He drums his fingers against the table and coughs performatively. “You can always cancel if it’s too much trouble. We don’t always have to meet up here. We can go somewhere else if you’d like. Somewhere more convenient. I don’t mind.”
She laughs once with effort and tosses her hair over one shoulder. “But I like the coffee here. And it’s close to you.”
His eyes follow the movement of her lips around the words. “As long as you’re okay with it. I won’t say anything.”
“There’s that gentleman in you again.” Her lips twitch as though they can feel his eyes.
He clears his throat and taps the cover of his book idly. “I ordered a little while ago. When you said you were ten minutes out. If that’s okay.”
“Did you get my usual?” She twirls a stray strand of hair in her face around her finger until it rebounds.
“I always do.” He straightens subconsciously in his chair as though proud.
“I know.” He has looked away in the direction of the counter and does not catch her expression. “Thanks. You know me so well.”
“I hope so.” He taps his foot. “Should be ready soon.”
The barista appears at their table as though announced and sets down a tray between them that cuts the conversation short. She pops her gum tastefully as she places plates and cups in front of the two of them. When she is finished she tucks the tray away back under her arm and turns on her heel with his empty cup in hand. Her hair is in a ponytail and swishes primly as she walks away.
“Right on time.” She pulls her own plate and cup close.
“Couldn’t have planned it better if I tried.” He pulls his own plate near an already-empty cup.
“Not that you would have. In the first place.” She stirs a tall spoonful of sugar into her cup with a discordant clatter. “I know you.” She blows on her coffee and her breath smells faintly of chocolate as it reaches him.
“You’re right. I know how much you hate surprises.” He takes a sip from his green tea and grimaces unwillingly at its bitterness. Reaching across the table he takes the sugar from her. Their fingers touch for a moment and linger.
“You mean just your surprises.” She twists her spoon absentmindedly as he stirs a delicate spoonful into his cup.
“Yeah. Well. Enough about me.” He breaks off a piece of banana muffin and pops it into his mouth. “Almost the holidays.”
She shudders visibly. “Don’t remind me. Thank god it’s the weekend. Another day of midterms and I might not have made it.”
He winces dramatically and sets down his spoon. “Ouch. That bad.”
“Worse. So much worse. You don’t even know.” She puts her face in her hands and sighs loudly. Her hair flutters in front of her face and he catches the scent of chocolate again. “And I still have more next week.”
“It’ll get better soon. And then it’ll be the holidays.” He takes a lazy sip of his tea and she scowls at him over the edge of the cup.
“Thanks. Easy for you to say. I bet everything is fine for you.” She tears off a piece of chocolate chip cookie and chews on it angrily.
“It’s been okay. Could be worse. Could be better.” He looks down at the tea and taps his finger against the cup.
“What a lazy answer.” She raises the cookie and takes a vicious bite. “I hope there’s at least one hard class somewhere.”
He looks up and cannot stop himself from smiling. There is a smear of melted chocolate just beside her lips. She glares at his smile.
“Stop smiling.” Her nostrils flare. “That wasn’t meant to be funny.”
“You got a little…” He gestures vaguely at her.
“What?”
“On your face.”
She wipes the opposite cheek hard with the back of her hand and he shakes his head.
“Here. Let me.” He uses a finger to wipe away the stain and licks it clean. “There. All gone.”
She touches the spot tenderly where he has left a small warmth. “Always the gentleman.” She looks down at the remains of the cookie and picks at the crumbs.
The cafe seems colder through the door remains closed. He taps his fingers restlessly against the table and gathers the courage for the words on his tongue. “I really did love you. You know. A lot.”
She hesitates a long moment before she can look up. “I know. I loved you too. I do.”
He pauses and then exhales. “We had good times. The best.”
“We did. I miss them.”
“So do I.”
The silence is the longest so far. Beneath the table their boots rest against one another as they have ever since she sat down. His fingers are motionless on the table and an inch away from hers.
“Do you ever…?” She struggles get the words out.
“Sometimes.” It is easier for him to respond than to offer it.
“And what do you think?” She sounds as though she does not want to know the answer.
“I don’t know. I’m not sure.” He hesitates. “But maybe we can talk more. Next time.”
She smiles at him and he returns the smile to her. “Next time.”
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Originally published in UC Irvine CHP Neon Anteater Renaissance, Winter 2016 Issue
